3v3rl4st L♥VE

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Family

I can't really get to sleep the whole night... been quite awake throughout, haha. Baby will probably be very furious if she sees this post. In fact, Baby actually cares a lot about me. Perhaps sometime when you are too loved and overly protected by someone, you'll tend to miss out those small stuff that the very person has done for you... If I scroll out the whole picture and take a good look, Baby had actually did so much for me.

She's there for me when I'm feeling down and I vented my anger on her instead, sorry Baby.
She walks that extra mile even when her strength is depleted just to make this stubborn me smile and feel happy, sorry Baby.
She did a hair-do that she knows very well that she'll hate it just because I want to see her in that hairstyle, sorry Baby.
She tries to resolve every quarrel by saying sorry to me, even when the fault lies at me at times, sorry Baby.
She puts up a indirect quarrel with her family, just because I wanted her to spend more time with me, sorry Baby.
She took a very long time to doll up just to make me feel proud bringing her around but I kept blaming her that she's wasting time, sorry Baby.
She saves up on her expenses by not buying things that she likes yet I'm spending like a tap without a knob, sorry Baby.
She cried many times for me and yet I find it not enough, sorry Baby.
She smile to me even on her worst mood and yet I kept pressing on, sorry Baby.
She picks up that heavy burden so that she can love me more, and yet I increased the weight, sorry Baby.
She worries so much for me but I'm not always appreciating, sorry Baby.
She always gave in to me and yet I said she didn't, sorry Baby.
She remembers everything that I once said I like and she saves on her meals and buy those stuff for me and I took for granted, sorry Baby.
She wanted me to be more direct but I always acted dilly-dally, sorry Baby.
She wanted me to be more mature yet I'm always acting so childish, sorry Baby.
She spent so much time to do something for me and yet I say it looked ok ok, sorry Baby.
She did her part as a wonderful gf and a wonderful wife but I kept malinging her, sorry Baby.

If I were to look at the whole picture... I owe my Baby too much. So many little things done that made such a big difference. I felt bad to make Baby cry unknowingly always. I'm sorry Baby. Thank you so much for what you've really done for me.

To those readers reading this, my Baby and I didn't quarrel... the reason why I'm inputing this post is because I find it is fair to let people who thinks that I'm good know that I'm actually not that perfect person walking around. I may look perfect... but who am I to say I'm perfect when I can't even secure my fiance's feeling and heart. Overall, I fail as a good bf. I may fall... but I'll never give up trying to stand again. Everytime I fall, I will stand again. And if I fall again, I'll push myself to stand again. And I'll keep standing up... just to walk beside you... every now and then... from the day we met... to the day we fell in love... to the day we get married... to the day we have our child... to the day our child get married... to the day our hair turns white... till that last breath I breath. I love you Baby. I'm not a charming guy, I'm not a millionaire and neither am I a very good guy... but there's three things that I can give Baby that I can assure of... and that's my love... my heart... and our future...

I will walk this path with you till the very end.

I'm the kind of person who hated regrets, but now, I'm living my everyday with regrets. I regret not telling you how much I love you every minute past. I regret not cherishing every second past. I regret not knowing you since the very start. I regret not having the ability to give you a good life now. And I regret to make you cry reading this post.

I love you Baby.

I finally understand that marriage is not something easy to handle. We need to plan for so many things. Our personal bills, home bills, food expenses, housing expenses, ceremony expenses, child's expenses, and so many more. I'd been really naive. No matter what, we'll walk through together no? Train your arm muscles my dear, for I'm going to hold your hand and never let go for so many years down this road. The road of you, me and our future's mini us.

LBF ~ A pledge that last forever.

0 Comments: